Rules for Life

Lazy day. I'm in list mode.

I must admit, I'm a sucker for clever expressions and simple rules. So, here are a few.
None of these are original, and I've heard all of them from more than one person at different times, but they're either funny or poignant. And if you're in the mood for either; enjoy.

Life Lessons
They're all relevant. Maybe.

Nothing brings people together like a shared hatred.

Before you get angry upon hearing the same question asked for the 50th time,
remember that it's the first time they've asked it.

 Don't have a honey where you make your money.

When in doubt, the fuller beer is yours.

The best thing you can do for someone is to let them know they are appreciated.

In a relationship, make sure you're treated nice and made to feel pretty. Everything else is negotiable.

 Vegetarians who don't drink coffee or alcohol are not to be trusted.

What are you worried about? Do you have any control over it? Then why worry?

To raise your average you've sometimes got to lower your standards.

It's all about the follow-through.

If you hesitate for more than three seconds after the bartender looks at you,
you do not deserve a drink.

It's a sign of intelligence to try new things.

Accept responsibility for your mistakes. Learn and move on.

There is no substitute for bacon.

The key to a great relationship is communication and appreciation. 

Guys, learn how to identify psycho chicks.
When ya'll keep dating them it just reinforces bad behavior.

You can't change a person, but you CAN make them secretive.

 On the intimacy scale, sharing a quiet drink is between a handshake and a kiss.

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